Originally Posted by
NM
A sister's letter to dearest little brother….
You came as the last addition to our small family
On a bright sunny evening when the whole world was on a holiday
1.1.1979 will forever be etched in our minds
as the day our little brother was born
The next few months were utter joy for me
It was like playing with a live doll
Watching you sleeping, feeding, crying,
Turning over, moving…..
You sat in your 7th month, crawled in your 8th,
Stood in your 9th month and by the time you turned 1, you were walking my dear
I remember every single moment of your development
I was there with you, remember?
I remember the time I fed you, bathed you, played with you
Cooked for you while you sat beside me in kitchen in our dear old house
I remember the times when you would run to me
Asking for MILO..hmm, that was your favourite drink..
and what would you say to me ???
'Akka, paal pOt cheeni pOt, milo pOt, Kuna aaam…'…
I can never forget that!
Thambi, you grew so fast in the intervening years
I missed you when I went to the boarding school and then on overseas
I missed your growing years - 6-11 years
But, I remember the letters you wrote me
And your little scribble in my autograph which I still have with me
Dearest brother, I remember the times
When you would just take a look at the rear light so of a car
And immediately say the make of the car at a very young age,
Before you were even 6!
Maybe that's why you became a car maniac when you grew up, dear!
I still remember the time when you cried for Appa not to drive the RED car
You must have sensed….
Appa crashed the car that night!
And, since then, you refused to get into a RED car!
You turned into a tall, handsome young man, adored by many
But, also resented by many
Was it because your frankness?
You were a strong character but this was the will power that helped you to move forward..
Thambi, no matter what people said, I have always adored you as my little brother
And for you, I bought a house so we could live together and travel to work/college together
But little did I know that you would miss our dear little old house so much
I still remember the good times we had in this old house of ours…
You were born there, our brother got married there, too
And it was our dear little Vithi Doodles' second home too!
Dearest brother, I still remember your joy when you received your LLB degree
You were cheered by many
You looked so handsome and happy
Thambi, you grew up to be domineering man
You made your decision to start your own business
We were ecstatic, overjoyed by this
At 23, you established Nashma Consultancy
NASHMA….taken from kuNASeelan, Harichandran, MAla..
The 3 of us siblings
I still remember the joy on your face the day you registered your firm
Dearest brother, I knew that 1 little worry you had was that I wasn't married
I know how much you adored and loved me
And I know how much Mom and I meant to you
And I also know how much you were overjoyed when I finally decided to get married!
You were over the moon
I still remember the plans you made to decorate the house
Preparation for wedding, video shooting, photo session etc
And when the final day came, you drove me to the temple, ayya..
Little did I know
That my last memory of a happy occasion with you would be my wedding day
You were there, dressed in an exquisite Kurta
And you were so happy to be the 'Machchaan thOlan'
We finally got to the studio for a family photo shoot
Now, I thank God we did that…..
Dearest thambi, you were so happy when I told you you were going to be Thaai maaman
You looked forward to coming over and seeing your little marumagal
You came dear, with loads of presents for her
And a beautiful locket for me
Thambi, we waited and waited and waited for your little marumagal to be born…
Finally she came but then, you had only 2 days with her
But I'm sure glad you took her first photo
And you photos taken of both of you together
These and your gifts for her will forever be with me
I'll make sure little Ananthiy knows her Thaai maman loved her very much
Thambi, the day came for me to say goodbye to you
I did not know that would be last time I see you alive ..
6th of January 2007 you flew back to Malaysia
I remember all our calls in the weeks that followed
I remember talking to you on the 3rd of March, thambi
You were so full of stories
And, I still remember you telling me you cooked kurma
And, that you missed amma very much in one your smses
I should have put our parents in the next flight after I got your sms!
Dearest Thambi…..
6th of March 2007 began as usual ….
But I had a bad dream, Mom had bad premonition, Dad had been having bad dreams ….
But, nothing pointed to fact that we were going to receive the news that would shook all of us….
Ayya, I had to be the person to receive the news of your passing at 6.30pm!
Oh!! That broke me down completely!!
I don't know how I drove back
And I don't know how I broke the news to our parents!
Oh! how crushed they were
I can still picture the scene ..the 4 of us embracing each other ..
Thambi….Why did you leave us so suddenly?
God is so cruel to take you away from us at a young age of 28!
You left a great deal of impact on many people..
Oh..the crowd that came for your funeral, ayya,..huge!
In your short life, you aimed and achieved great heights
The outpour of love and emotion was just humongous
Ayya, when you left us in January, I was to come in 2008 for your wedding!.
But, did I know that I would come to send you on your final journey?
It broke my heart to see our parents…
And your absolutely crushed Anna…
And it shattered me when I had to do my ritual of sending you away!
You looked so peaceful, ayya, as though you were in a deep sleep…
I can never get that image out of my mind…
With a heavy heart… I had to say GOODBYE to you, ayya,
My dearest little brother Kuna
Born 1.1.79, Passed away on 6.3.07 …..
And leaving all of us with a heavy heart, great sadness
And a life which will never be the same ever again…
We have lost our ability to laugh wholeheartedly ever since…
Will this remain for the rest of our lives?
Will the pain ease a little as time goes by?
Will I still have faith and believe in God?
Only time will tell…
But, Ayya, wherever you are, I want you be peaceful and happy
And I pray and hope you are blessed with a much much better family
In your next life ..you deserve to have a great life, Thambi..
For one last time…
I wish to tell you how much I loved you when you were alive
And how much you are still loved now even though you are gone forever
I know you are watching over us, you dear little family
And I also know you are my daughter's little guardian angel
And I will come and see you wherever you are when my time comes…
Till we meet again…
GOODBYE Little brother..
May peace be with you…..
Love,
Akka
I dont know what to say.. I am lost for words
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