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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#11
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gops (@ 203.*) on: Fri Jul 30 03:07:50 EDT 2004
In love what u do u get married ur lover becomes
ur husband /wife..
so love ends there.
what is marriage
till u tie a manglasustra/ ring /registered
ur marriage ends there.
ur life starts after marriage
so arranged marriage is got more mileage than the luv marriage.
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27th October 2004 09:31 AM
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#12
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Chandra (@ chrt*) on: Fri Jul 30 04:32:59 EDT 2004
I personally feel arranged marriage is good. Mine is arranged marriage and I live happily with my wife for the past 3 years.
One advantage with love marriage especially for girls is, in case of any problems with the buy like boozing, affiars etc, we can have the whole family behind us in getting the problem solved.
One more thing which I liked is the way kids grow in arranged marriage, they have a clear idea as to who they are, whats their language, basically where they stand. One of my cousin got love married, both of them speaking different languages, basically of different cultures... Now his son is a mixture of the two, the other kids in our family don't move with this poor guy very much, with my cousin there are issues related to culture like celebration of festivals, how the kid should grow etc etc...
Love marriage is good until you get married, the misic starts only after marriage. Many problems start comming up, which in real like are not at all problems.
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#13
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Chandra (@ chrt*) on: Fri Jul 30 04:33:18 EDT 2004
Don't you think a guy who goes into love marriage betrays his parents?, betrays the trust they have in him?? All the excuses like "Love is Divine" etc is fine, but I'am talking about the time when he first gets the idea to love someone... When a guy who can betray his parents who had taken care of him in the early years, what is th guarantee that he will not ditch this girl one day when he meets a very good looking girl????
Think it over...
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#14
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nirosha (@ j16.*) on: Fri Jul 30 10:25:23 EDT 2004
That's right, arranged marriages have more support. Families actually pick each other for convenience. The couple's needs are second.
Being in love is not wrong, neither is it always looks based. A lot of it is based on comfort. Being comfortable with each other that you could talk about everything and anything. Anyway, I can't argue much. I just married my husband after we dated for over 2 years. We're okay with each other.
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#15
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Fariduddin Faqiryar (@ 80.2*) on: Sun Aug 8 04:23:30 EDT 200
Arrange marraige is good than love marraige because i got arrange marriage. and i am happy with this.
thanks
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#16
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saima (@ cach*) on: Sun Aug 8 20:14:31 EDT 2004
I reckon arranged r much better, obviously coz the love actually starts after marriage. There is no point ov marryin sum1 you love coz its like ending LOVE!!! Also another thing is that if u love sum1 it dunt mean u hav to get the person.
Arrange is betta in many wayz coz parents can sort problems out, u dnt really hav to b comitted to ur husband, love is interestin afta marriage, coz u wanna hav a fresh start afta marriage!!! wot do u reckon GUYZZZZ???
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#17
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nirosha (@ j49.*) on: Sun Aug 8 23:36:32 EDT 2004
If the marriage works out well for the couple, then it's certainly made in heaven. But in real life, there are complications that gets in the way. Dowry is one reason why many families quarrel over and it certainly affects the couple. Living arrangement is the other where everything maynot be to one's satisfaction, etc. We humans grow-up as conditioned beings in our maternal homes that the litmus test of standing up for ourselves, etc comes from living independently from the birth home.
Many love marriages come under extreme pressure from the families as it's deemed inappropriate culturally. So opposition is considered the 1st option and not closing ranks in order to smoothen the transition from single life to married life for the couple.
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#18
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spunkyvixen (@ 203.*) on: Thu Aug 12 08:38:44 EDT 2004
I think it's great that you guys have had awesome experiences with arranged marriages, but it seems like the reason why you don't find love marriages acceptable is purely for the fact that you haven't experienced it.
I'm sure that if you had found your significant other through a love marriage, your opinions would be slanted. But honestly, each to their own. I also believe it's great to have family support in each facet of your life since they play such an important role. But I think the above poems/views/analogies between love and arranged marriages are a product of our long instilled thoughts that have been embedded, basically by our families.
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#19
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spunkyvixen (@ 203.*) on: Thu Aug 12 08:39:20 EDT 2004
If the chance arose where you found Mr or Ms Right, I'm sure as hell you would jump at the chance. But don't put love marriage down on unfounded beliefs. Life is full of opportunities and sometimes the experience of companionship is so wonderful.
So, the point of my post, do what makes your heart happy. Don't feel held back by family where you shouldn't have to, otherwise you end up resenting your family because you had to make a compromise between yourself and them. But, as with everything, there are limits to what you should and shouldn't do, which I'm sure you guys also agree on. But don't make misconceptions on love marriage, as it appears those in arranged marriages have never had the chance to experience a relationship before marriage.
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27th October 2004, 09:31 AM
#20
Senior Member
Platinum Hubber
spunkyvixen (@ 203.*) on: Thu Aug 12 08:39:49 EDT 2004
Create harmony and love amongst yourselves and the next generation...the world is so cruel and separated already, why add to it when you can create happiness through respect?
Think about it. I'd love to hear your thoughts on what I have said.
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