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atomhouse
26th July 2006, 11:16 AM
Here I've presented some of my attempts at translating English poems into Tamil.I've tried my best to capture the same mood and flow of the original.Looking forward for your comments & suggestions..

atomhouse
26th July 2006, 01:13 PM
[tscii:923990a67c]¸¼ü¸¨È À¡¨È¢ý ¯ÂÃò¾¢ø
¦À¡Õ¨ÁÔ¼ý ¦ÁÇÉÁ¡¸ ±ðÎ측Ģ,
Å¢Ã¢ó¾ ¦ÅǢ¢ý ¦ÅÚ¨Á¨Â ¬Ã¡Âô À¡÷츢ÈÐ.
¾ýÛûÇ¢ÕóРŢâ츢ÈРŨĨÂ.
±ýÚõ ŢâòÐ즸¡ñ§¼ §À¡¸¢ÈÐ;
ÅÄ¢ÂȢ¡Р§Å¸õ Üðθ¢ÈÐ.

±ý ¬òÁ§É, ¿£ ±íÌ ¿¢ü¸¢È¡ö?
«ÇÅ¢øÄ¡ ¦Åð¼¦ÅÇ¢ ÝÆ ¾É¢ò¾¢Õ츢áö.
ÓÊÅüÈ «ÛÀÅí¸Ùõ, ¬Ãö¸Ùõ
«ÅüÈ¢ý À¢¨½ôÒ¸¨Çì ¸¡Ïõ §¾¼ø¸Ùõ
¦¾¡¼÷¸¢ýÈÉ,
¿£ ¦ÅñÎõ À¡Äí¸û «¨ÁÔõ ŨÃ,
«¨ÄÔõ ÁÉõ ¸¨Ã¸¡Ïõ ŨÃ,
¯ÉÐ Å¨Ä ±í§¸Ûõ º¢ìÌõ ŨÃ.


Original:

A noiseless, patient spider,
I mark'd where on a little promontory it stood isolated,
Mark'd how to explore the vacant vast srrounding,
It launched forth filament, filament, filament, out of itself,
Ever unreeling them, ever tirelessly speeding them.
And you my soul where you stand,
Surrounded, detatched, in measureless oceans of space,
Ceaselessly musing, venturing, throwing, seeking the spheres
to connect them,
Till the bridge you will need be formed,till the ductile anchor
hold,
Till the gossamer thread you fling catch somewhere, O my
soul.


-Walt Whitman.


[/tscii:923990a67c]

atomhouse
26th July 2006, 02:36 PM
[tscii:7fa669081f]Å¢Øí¸¢É¡ý,
«ùÅüÒ¾ Å¡÷ò¨¾¸¨Ç;
¬òÁý,
ÅÖô¦ÀüÚ ¯Â¢÷ò¾Ð;
¬Æ ÁÈó¾¡ý,
¾ý ÅÚ¨Á ¿¢¨Ä¨ÂÔõ,
¾ý ¯¼Ä¢ý ¿¢¨Ä¡¨Á¨ÂÔõ;
¬Ê Á¸¢úó¾¡ý,
¾ý Å¡úÅ¢ý §Å¾¨É¸Ç¢ø;
þî;ó¾¢Ã º¢È̸û,
¿õÒí¸û,
´Õ áÄÇ¢ò¾ô ÀâÍ!
þÚì¸õ ¾Ç÷ó¾
ÁÉõ ¾Õõ Ţξ¨Ä!

Original:

HE ate and drank the precious words,
His spirit grew robust;
He knew no more that he was poor,
Nor that his frame was dust.
He danced along the dingy days,
And this bequest of wings
Was but a book. What liberty
A loosened spirit brings!

-Emelie Dickinson.
[/tscii:7fa669081f]

pavalamani pragasam
26th July 2006, 06:24 PM
Good attempts. Try to avoid the small spelling mistakes in Tamil font. Looking for more!

atomhouse
26th July 2006, 09:43 PM
[tscii:a526c9167b]Thanks for the encouragement, pp ma'm.Will be more careful..thank you again for pointing out.


¾Åú¸¢ÈÐ ¸¼ø,
Å¢¨¾Ó¨Çò¾
ÁÃí¸Ç¢ý À¢½í¸¨Ç
Å¢Øí¸¢Â Á½Ä¢§Ä.

¸ñãÊî ÍÆÖõ ¯Ä§¸,
±ò¾¨É ÁüÈí¸Ç¢ý
ÁÂì¸ò¾¢§Ä
¿£ ¾¢¨Ç츢ȡö!

þýÚ, µ¨º¸Ç¢ý ¸ÄÅÃò¾¢ø
ºÄºÄìÌõ ¦¾Õì¸û,
´Õ ¿¡û,
¬ú츼Ģý ÁÊ¢§Ä.

¿¢Æø§À¡Ä ¯Õį̀ÄÔõ
Á¨Ä¸û, ¿¢ƒõ¾¡ý.
Àɢ¡ö ¯Õ¸¢,
§Á¸Á¡ö À¢Ã¢óÐ À½¢ìÌõ,
¿¢Äí¸Ùõ «ôÀÊò¾¡ý.

þÕóÐõ,
±ý ¿¢¨É׸Ǣø ¦¾¡¨ÄóÐ,
¸É׸¨Ç ͸Á¡¸ò ¾Ã¢ô§Àý,
«¨Å ¯ñ¨Á¦ÂýÚ ¯½÷óÐ.

±ýÚõ, ±ý ¯ûÇõ
À¢Ã¢Â¡Ð ¯ý¨É,
¾ÅÈ¢, ±ý ¯¾Î¸û
ÅÆ¢ÂÛôÀ¢É¡Öõ.


Original:
THERE ROLLS THE DEEP
There rolls the deep where grew the tree.
O earth, what changes hast thou seen!
There where the long street roars, hath been
The stillness of the central sea.

The hills are shadows, and they flow
From form to form, and nothing stands;
They melt like mist,the solidlands,
Like clouds they shape themselves and go.


But in my spirit will I dwell,
And dream my dream, and hold it true;
For tho' my lipsmay breathe adieu,
I cannot think the thing farewell.


-ALFRED LORD TENNYSON.

(This is an extract from 'In Memoriam' in which he expresses his deep feelings on the loss of his intimate friend, Arthur Henry Hallam).





[/tscii:a526c9167b]

pavalamani pragasam
26th July 2006, 10:12 PM
[tscii:37de47f850]There where the long streetsroars, hath been
The stillness of the central sea

þýÚ µ¨º¸Ç¢ý ¸ÄÅÃò¾¢ø «ÊÀÎõ ¦¾Õì¸û ±ý§È¡ ¿Î츼Ģý «¨Á¾¢Â¡É ÁÊÂý§È¡

atomhouse, tell me if my interpretation is wrong. Also there must be a typo in 'streetsoars': singular plural incompatibility.[/tscii:37de47f850]

atomhouse
27th July 2006, 08:50 AM
You are right in your interpretation,ma'm.As this is an elegy, even in this context of cyclic changes,my immediate visualization had been that of destruction and loss when I wrote this 3 years back.This poem was in the higher secondary English Reader when my sister was doing her 12th..when she first read it to me,I was choking with tears...

And yes, its a typing error.I've edited & corrected it now.

pavalamani pragasam
27th July 2006, 10:47 AM
:D
The english typo is edited but the Tamil translation? :roll:

atomhouse
27th July 2006, 05:01 PM
:oops2: I've edited it now.I think this one is more of an adaptation than translation.I've used extra descriptions to make the translation to stand on its own. What do you think?

pavalamani pragasam
27th July 2006, 05:21 PM
Hope you didn't mistake me. I just wanted your work to be correct!

As for the exactness of translation there are both kind of beliefs, that the translation should be very literal, including what is given, excluding what is not meant( whenever I attempt translation I adhere to this school!), and that an almost near version in acceptable presentation.

For example, in the lines we are discussing you have changed the singular street to streets in the translation and the 'stillness' in the poem's line is missing in your translation. I would have strictly adhered to the singular number & faithfully included the stillness of the deep bottom of the sea. But on the whole your rendering is quite pleasing & not very away from the general mood/trend. So such minor preferences are personal.

atomhouse
27th July 2006, 08:43 PM
Hope you didn't mistake me. I just wanted your work to be correct!


Think the emoticon is exaggerating...I value your suggestions very much.

I've always had this dilema...for one thing it is sometimes difficult for me to translate exactly the words and the mood,along with a readable rhyme scheme...must read a lot more & expand my vocabulary..

atomhouse
28th July 2006, 09:11 AM
[tscii:18824666df]±ø§Ä¡÷ Å¡ú×õ
ÍÕí¸¢ì ¦¸¡ñÊÕ츢ÈÐ
²§¾¡ ´Õ ¨ÁÂò¨¾ §¿¡ì¸¢,
¦ÅÇ¢ôÀ¨¼Â¡¸§Å¡,
«¨Á¾¢Â¡¸§Å¡.

±øÄ¡ ÁÉ¢¾ þÂøÀ¢Öõ
´Ç¢÷¸¢ÈÐ, ´Õ ÌȢ째¡û,
¾ý¨Éò¾¡ý «í¸£¸Ã¢ì¸¡ÁÖõ,
¿õÀ¢ì¨¸Â¢ý ¾ýÉõÀ¢ì¨¸¨Â
Á£È¢Â¾¡¸×õ.

«¨¼Å¾üìÌ,
¸ñ½¡Ê ¦º¡÷¸¦ÁÉ,
±îºÃ¢ì¨¸Ô¼ý §Á¡¸¢ì¸ôÀÎõ.
¦¾¡ÎžüìÌ
Å¡ÉÅ¢øÄ¢ý ŢǢõ¦ÀÉ
¿õÀ¢ì¨¸ÂüÈ ¦ÅǢ¢ø þÕìÌõ.

±É¢Ûõ,
ÐÃò¾ôÀð¼¡ø,
¦¾Ã¢¸¢È àÃò¾¢ø
Åó¾¢ÕìÌõ;
Å¡¦ÉýÉ ¯ÂÃõ,
Óɢ¢ý ¦À¡Ú¨ÁìÌ!

«¨¼Â¡Áø §À¡¸Ä¡õ,
Å¡úÅ¢ý
¸£Æ¡É ±ò¾É¢ôҸǡø,
±ýÈ §À¡Ðõ,
¸¡Ä ¦ÅÇ¢
Á£ñÎõ ¨¸ì¦¸¡ÎìÌõ,
ÓÂü ¾Çá¾Å÷ìÌ.

Original:

EACH life converges to some centre
Expressed or still;
Exists in every human nature
A goal,

Admitted scarcely to itself, it may be,
Too fair
For credibility’s temerity
To dare.

Adored with caution, as a brittle heaven,
To reach
Were hopeless as the rainbow’s raiment
To touch,

Yet persevered toward, surer for the distance;
How high
Unto the saints’ slow diligence
The sky!

Ungained, it may be, by a life’s low venture,
But then,
Eternity enables the endeavoring
Again.

-Emelie Dickinson.
[/tscii:18824666df]

Ramachander
24th October 2006, 06:56 PM
I have tried to translate some tamil poems in to english and most of them are available in my web site(one of Kannadasan and few of Mahakavi Bharathy)
www.poetrypoem.com/ramya475
I have also translated Abhirami Anthadhi in to english Anthadi.Please read it in my web site
www.sthothrarathnas.com
Ramachander

sundararaj
27th November 2006, 07:04 PM
very nice ones atomhouse. Thanks for the translations :clap: :ty:

sundararaj
27th November 2006, 07:06 PM
very nice ones atomhouse. Thanks for the translations :clap: :ty:

atomhouse
28th November 2006, 09:20 AM
:notworthy: