A shame

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Originally Posted by Jilaba

இந்திய மக்கள் தொகையில் சரிபாதி பெண்கள் இருக்கும்போது, அதென்ன 33% ரிசர்வேஷன்...??. அது கூட எப்போ வரும்னு தெரியலை. ஏன் இந்த ஆண்கள் நினைத்திருந்தால் எப்போதோ அந்த சட்டத்தைக் கொண்டு வந்து நிறைவேற்றியிருக்க முடியாதா..?..

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so has to decide by men

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Originally Posted by Jilaba

எல்லாம் பாசாங்கு. ஏமாறுகிற பெண் குலம் இருக்கும்வரை ஏமாற்றுகிற ஆண்களுக்கு கொண்டாட்டம்தான். .

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:-)))

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Originally Posted by Jilaba

இங்குள்ள படித்த பெண்களுக்கே அது புரிய மாட்டேங்குதே. அப்புறம் எங்கே பாமர மக்கள் தெளிவு பெற....?.
.

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:?:

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Originally Posted by Jilaba

எல்லா இடங்களிலும் பெண்களுக்கு 50% ஒதுக்கீடு வேண்டும். அதை தர மறுக்கும் ஆண்குலத்தை வேரறுப்போம்.

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:D

Dear Jilaba,

ஆண்கள் மேல் உங்களுக்கு ஏன் இவ்வளவு வெறுப்பு வந்தது என்று எனக்கு தெரியவில்லை. ஒருகாலத்தில் டாக்டர் மற்றும் ஆசிரியை தவிர வேறு துறைகளில் பெண்கள் இல்லையென்பது உண்மைதான் என்றாலும், இன்றைக்கு பெண்களின் இந்தளவு முன்னேற்றத்துக்கு ஆண்கள் ஒரு முக்கிய காரணம் என்பதை மறுக்க முடியாது.

ராணுவத்திலும் காவல் துறையிலும் பெண்கள் இன்றைக்கு சாதிக்கிறார்கள் என்பது ஒரு உண்மையென்றால், அதற்கு வழி ஏற்படுத்தி கொடுத்த ஆண்களும் முக்கிய காரணமில்லையா?. இதற்கு முன்னர் ஆண்கள்தானே முழுக்க முழுக்க அந்த துறையில் இருந்தார்கள். அப்படீன்னா, பெண்களையும் இதில் பணியாற்றச்செய்யலாம் என்று முடிவு செய்தவர்கள் அவர்கள்தானே?. வழி ஏற்படுத்திக் கொடுத்தவர்கள் ஆண்கள், அதை நன்றாக பயன்படுத்திக்கொண்டவர்கள் பெண்கள் என்றுதான் பார்க்க வேண்டும். அதுதான் உண்மையும் கூட.

இந்திரா காந்தி ஒரு தொகுதியில் நின்று ஒரு எம்.பி.யாக ஆகலாம். ஆனால் அவரை பிரதமராக தேர்ந்தெடுத்தது, பாராளுமன்றத்தில் பெரும்பான்மையாக இருக்கும் ஆண் எம்.பி.க்கள் தான். நீங்கள் சொவது போல அத்தனை ஆண் எம்.பி.க்களுக்கும் 'ஆணாதிக்கம்' தலை தூக்கியிருந்தால், இன்றுவரை ஒரு பெண் பிரதமரை நாம் அடைந்திருக்க முடியாது.

இதே நிலைமைதான் இங்கு ஜெயலலிதாவுக்கும். வெறும் பெண் எம்.எல்.ஏக்கள் மட்டும் ஆதரவளித்து அவரை முதலமைச்சர் ஆக்கிவிட முடியாது.

வரதட்சணை கொடுமையில் முக்கிய பங்கு வகிப்பவள் மாப்பிள்ளையின் அம்மா என்ற பெண்தான். நாம் பல இடங்களில் பார்க்கிறோம். தன் பையனுக்கு சம்பந்தம் பேசும்போது, மாப்பிள்ளையும் அவன் அப்பாவும் 'டம்மி'யாக்கப்பட்டு விடுகின்றனர். அவர்கள் வரதட்சணை கேட்டால் கூட முன்னின்று தடுக்க வேண்டிய அம்மாக்காரி என்ன செய்கிறாள்?. அவ்ர்கள் கேட்காவிட்டாலும் கூட, இவளே முன்னின்று வரதட்சணை பேரம், நகை பேரம் பேசுகிறாள். நம் வீட்டில் வாழ வரப்போகிறவளும் நம்மைப்போல, நம் மகளைப்போல ஒரு பெண்தானே என்ற எண்ணம் மாப்பிள்ளையின் அம்மா என்ற பெண்ணுக்கு வரவில்லையே. ஏன்..??. இதற்கும் ஆண்களா காரண்ம்..??.

ஆண்களின் கொடுமைகளை மட்டும் பேசுகிறீர்களே. எத்தனை இடங்களில் ஆண்கள், பெண்களிடம் சிக்கி அவதிப்படுகிறார்கள் என்பதை பெண்களாகிய நாம் என்றாவது சிந்தித்து இருக்கிறோமா?.

உங்கள் மனதில் ஆண்களைப்பற்றிய தவறான எண்ணம் ஒரு வடுவாக அமைந்துவிட்டது. முதலில் அதைக்களைய முற்படுங்கள்.

சாரதா :thumbsup:

இன்றும் நம் சமூகம் ஒரு ஆண் மேலாதிக்க சமூகம் என்பதை மறுக்க முடியாது .ஆனாலும் பெண்ணுரிமைக்காக குரல்கொடுத்த பெண்களைவிட பாரதியார்,பெரியார் போன்ற ஆண்களே அதிகம் .

Saradha madam,

Romba theLivaana sindhanai ungaLukku. Hats off.

UngaLidam pengaL katrukkoLLa vEndiyathu yEraaLam...yEraaLam.....

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நம் வீட்டில் வாழ வரப்போகிறவளும் நம்மைப்போல, நம் மகளைப்போல ஒரு பெண்தானே என்ற எண்ணம் மாப்பிள்ளையின் அம்மா என்ற பெண்ணுக்கு வரவில்லையே. ஏன்..??.

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:yes: :thumbsup:

sometimes ..... romba kodumayaana vishayam enna nna ..... adhukku maruppu sollaaada magan ..... KARANAM :roll:

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Originally Posted by bingleguy

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நம் வீட்டில் வாழ வரப்போகிறவளும் நம்மைப்போல, நம் மகளைப்போல ஒரு பெண்தானே என்ற எண்ணம் மாப்பிள்ளையின் அம்மா என்ற பெண்ணுக்கு வரவில்லையே. ஏன்..??.

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:yes: :thumbsup:

sometimes ..... romba kodumayaana vishayam enna nna ..... adhukku maruppu sollaaada magan ..... KARANAM :roll:

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No, it is time to push this back to women! Forget how the son behaves, traditionally, maamiyar-maatrupen sandai thaan perusa irukku.

Inga Aan vargathukku velai illai. Pengal thaan ithukku bathil solla vendum.

Husbands may love their wives and wives may not have any problems with the husbands...the issue only lies with the Mother-in-law.

Aangalum, yaarai vittu kodupathu endru theriyaamal, thavikkum nilamai...ellam pengalaal vantha kodumai

:lol: Jilaba yOsanaippadi kalyaaNaththai oziththuvidalaam! aaNkaL nimmathiyaaka(!?) irukkalaam! :rotfl:
Badri, kaalam maaRivittathu, TV serialkaLil mattumthaan maamiyaar kodumai athikam. nijaththil maamiyaarkaL vaalai suruttikkoLLa pazakivittaarkaL!!! Increasing 'education' levels & economic independence of sons besides rarity of joint family system contribute to this inevitable change!

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Husbands may love their wives and wives may not have any problems with the husbands...the issue only lies with the Mother-in-law.

Aangalum, yaarai vittu kodupathu endru theriyaamal, thavikkum nilamai...ellam pengalaal vantha kodumai

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:rotfl: Badri nna ..... otte kalakku kalakki ;-)

Well ... truly portrayed ...... indha vishayam neenga eduthu sonnadhu oru alavukku sariye ..... generally thani kudithanam poravangalo, illai oruthanga innoruthangalai adakka therinjavangalo... indha maadiri prachanai la maatikkardhu illai ....

typical egoistic nature ..... hubby wife mattum illai .... MIL DIL la yum undu ..... nethikki varaikkum thaan solra dhai kettukondu irudha avaloda payyan, innikki manaivi nnu oruthi vandha udanayum avalukku pudicha maadiri panradhu ..... othu pogardhu illai .... well, in contra ... life la inimae better half aa irukka vendiya thaan solli ketkaama ... thannoda amma solradhai ketta .... boogambam dhaan ....

idhukku rendukkum naduvula maatikittu irukkiravanga :-) paavam aangal :-)

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Originally Posted by pavalamani pragasam

Badri, kaalam maaRivittathu, TV serialkaLil mattumthaan maamiyaar kodumai athikam. nijaththil maamiyaarkaL vaalai suruttikkoLLa pazakivittaarkaL!!!

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PP madam,

What saradha madam tells is, a mother-in-law is also a WOMAN and she already crossed the period of daughter-in-law in her life, and knows very well about the pains of a DIL.

But when she becomes a Mother-in-law, how she comfortably forgets her previous pains and starts to do 'kodumais' for her present daughter-in-law?.

That means a WOMAN (MIL) is not treating another WOMAN (her DIL) as a normal human being, how can women can blame MEN for everything...??.

First a Woman MUST understand another WOMAN.

Oru veettil vaazha vandhirukkum pennaippatri illaathathum pollaathathum solli maamiyaar manadhil vishaththai thoovi viduvathu yaar theriyumma?. andha areavil uLLa PENGAL thaane thavira aangaL alla.

Broad generalisation!!!

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Originally Posted by bingleguy

nethikki varaikkum thaan solra dhai kettukondu irudha avaloda payyan, innikki manaivi nnu oruthi vandha udanayum avalukku pudicha maadiri panradhu ..... othu pogardhu illai ....

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idhukku orE vazhi, AVAL than maganukku thirumanam seythu vaikkaamal, eppOthum than madiyilEyE vaiththukkoLLa vEndum.

aanaal pennaippetra APPANIDAM irundhu (kavanikkavum... pennidam irundhO allathu pennin ammaavidam irundhO alla) 'varadhatchanai'yai karappatharkaaga, paiyanukku thirumanam sythu vaikka vEndiyathu. Pinnar marumagaL vandhathum avaLai kodumaippaduththa vEndiyathu... idhu enna niyaayam..???.

maamiyaargaL seyyum indha kodumaigaL patri endha maadhar sangamaavathu, magaLir panchaayaththAvathu vaai thiRappaargaLaa?... oooohummm. avagaLukku thitta therindhathu ellaam onnE onnuthaan... "aangaL"... "aangaL...aangaL"...

pazaiya paattu onnu njaapakam varuthu:
'neengaL aththanai pErum uththamarthaanaa sollungaL'
iru paalaarilum black sheep uNdu. appuRamum pozuthu pOkkaaka argue paNnikkoNdirukkiROm!

The broad generalizations be damned.

Instead of finger-pointing the individuals, or groups (as in MIL, DIL, husbands, sons, etc), we should be looking at the system!, Not just the current state, how much it has sustained and changed over-the-years!

Let's understand the age-old chauvinistic structure, women are overtly dependent on men (father, husband and son)! As she grows old, she is possessive over her son. Heck, you get a car and you drive it for years, wouldn't you be possessive of that damn thing? Imagine that to be a son, after all, we have seen numerous thamizh films which rides/dwells on this sentiment, " flesh taken out of her womb". Just in case it sounded funny, wipe that smirk off. I'm serious. You can imagine the years of pain, effort, love and grooming has gone through. Why would she feel 'insecure' about another woman entering into her household? She's worried about being ignored. It's quite natural. Now the question is, the psyche, How would you prevent that 'sense of seclusion', fear, detachment, etc?
அதெ விட்டுட்டு :oops:

Now don't get me wrong, It's dependent on the entities (MIL, DIL, son/husband) but wouldn't it be much easier, had it been without this dependency on men and the closely-knit structure of Indian families surely doesn't help, do they?

Not all women are at fault, just like how all men aren't. Let's change our MCP-induced-structure first.

Makes good sense!

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Ì𨼧¡, ÌÕ¼§É¡, Ӽŧɡ, ¸¢Æŧɡ ¡á¢Õó¾¡Öõ ¦ÀâÂÅ÷¸û ¦º¡øÖìÌ «¼í¸¢ «ÅÛìÌ ¸Øò¨¾ ¿£ðÊ, ÌÎõÀ À¡Ãõ ÍÁóÐ, «øÄÄ¢§Ä ¯ÆýÚ ¦Àñ¸û ÁÊó¾ ¿¢¨ÄìÌ ÓüÚôÒûÇ¢ ¨Åò¾¡¸¢Å¢ð¼Ð þýÚ. ¬Â¢Ûõ ¦ÀñÏìÌ ¦Àñ§½ ±¾¢Ã¢Â¡¸¢, ¾¢ÕÁ½ò¨¾ ´Õ ºó¨¾ §ÀÃÁ¡ì¸¢, ºõº¡Ãò¨¾ ºñ¨¼ì¸ÇÁ¡ì¸¢, º¢ÚÁ¾¢Â¡ø Å¡úÅ¢ø þ¼÷ÜðÎõ ÀÆì¸í¸Ç¢Ä¢ÕóÐ ¿¡õ þýÛõ Å¢ÎÀ¼Å¢ø¨Ä§Â!

¾ýÛ¼¨Ä ãÊ Á¨Èì¸î ¦º¡ýÉ «¼ìÌӨȢĢÕóРŢÎÀðÎ ÀñÒìÌõ ¦ÀÕ¨ÁìÌÓâ ¦Àñ½Æ¨¸ ¦À¡Ð Å¢Õó¾¡ì¸¢ ¸¡ÁÄ£¨Ä¸Ç¢ý §¸Î¸ÙìÌ «Ê¨Á¡ÉР;ó¾¢Ãò¾¢ý «¨¼Â¡ÇÁ¡?

¦Àñ½¢ÂøÒ¸¨Ç ¦¾¡¨ÄôÀо¡ý ÓØ Í¾ó¾¢Ãõ ±ýÈ Á¡¨Â «¸Ä¡Áø ¦Àñ Óý§ÉÚÅÐ ±í ¹Éõ? ¾¡ö¨Á ¾¨¸¨Á ÁÈóР;ó¾¢Ãò¨¾ ¾ì¸ ¨ÅòÐì ¦¸¡ûÅÐ ±í ¹Éõ? þÕð¼¨È¢ĢÕóÐ ¦ÅÇ¢ôÀð¼¾¢ø ¸ñ ܺ¢ ÌÕ¼¡Ì¾ø ºÃ¢§Â¡?

¬¨½ Å¢ïÍõ ¬¨ºÂ¢ø ¸ÊÅ¡ÇÁ¢øÄ¡ ¸¡ðÎì̾¢¨Ã¦ÂÉ ¾È¢¦¸ðÎ º¢üÈ¢ýÀò¾¢ý À¢ý§É µÎž¡ ¯ñ¨ÁÂ¡É Í¾ó¾¢Ãõ? «õÁÂì¸ò¾¢ø ãú¸¢, Å¢ÇõÀà §Á¡¸ò¾¢ø ºÚ츢, «ÛÀÅ¢ò¾ þýÀ¦ÁøÄ¡õ §À¡Ä¢¦ÂÉ ÒâóÐŢθ¢È§¾! þò¾¨ÉÔõ þÚ¾¢Â¢ø ±Â¢ðŠ «Ãì¸É¢ý §¸¡ÃôÀü¸Ç¢§Ä º¢ì¸¢¼ò¾¡§É¡?

ÁÚÀì¸õ ´ýÚõ þôÀ¢Ã¨É¢ø ¯ûÇÐ: þ¸¨Çò àñÎõ þý¨È ¦Åð¼¦ÅÇ¢îºÁ¡É ¯Ä¸¢ø ¦¸ð¼¨ÄóÐ ¦ÀÕ§¿¡ö ¦ÀüÚ ÅÕõ ÒÕ„ý¸Ç¢¼Á¢ÕóÐ ¾ý ¬§Ã¡ì¸¢Âò¨¾, ¾ý ¯Â¢¨Ã ¸¡ôÀ¡üÈ¢ì ¦¸¡ûÙõ ;ó¾¢Ãõ ¦Àñ¸ÙìÌ þýÛõ Óؾ¡ö ¸¢¨¼ì¸Å¢ø¨Ä§Â! ¬½¡¾¢ì¸Óõ, ºã¸ò¾¢ý ¸¡Ä¡Å¾¢Â¡É º¢ò¾¡ó¾í¸Ùõ «¸ÄÅ¢ø¨Ä§Â!

¦À¡Õó¾¡ ¾¢ÕÁ½ò¾¢Ä¢ÕóРŢÎÀ¼ ÅÆ¢ À¢ÈóÐÅ¢ð¼¡Öõ ºð¼õ ¸ñ¼ Óý§ÉüÈò¨¾ ºã¸ò¾¢ý À¡÷¨Å ¸¡½¡¾ ¿¢¨Ä¢§Ä, ¾É¢òÐ Å¡Øõ ¦Àñ¸Ç¢ý ;ó¾¢Ãò¾¢ø ÓبÁ§ÂÐ? ¸ñ¼Éí¸Ùõ ¸ñ½¢ÂÁ¢øÄ¡ Å¢Á÷ºÉí¸ÙÁ¡ö «Å÷¸¨Ç §¿¡ì¸¢ ¿£ðÊ ÍðÎÅ¢Ãø Á¼í¸Å¢ø¨Ä§Â! ÀÃó¾ ÁÉôÀ¡ý¨Á, ¿¢Â¡ÂÁ¡É «Çק¸¡ø¸û ÀüȢ ŢƢôÒ½÷× þøÄ¡Áø ¦Àñ¸û ;ó¾¢Ãõ «¨¼óÐŢ𼾡¸ ¯½÷ÅÐ º¡ò¾¢ÂÁ¡?

¦Àñ¨½ þÃñ¼¡õ¾Ã À¢Ã¨ƒÂ¡ö À¡÷ìÌõ ÁÉôÀ¡ý¨Á Óؾ¡ö Á¡ÈÅ¢ø¨Ä§Â! ¦Àñº¢Í즸¡¨Ä¸Ùõ, ¸ÕÅ¢§Ä§Â ¦Àñº¢Í¨Å ¦¸¡øÖõ ¦¸¡ÞÃÓõ ̨È󾾡¸ §º¾¢ ÅÃÅ¢ø¨Ä§Â! ÁÉ¢¾ÌÄò¾¢ü§¸ ¾£Ã¡¾ «ÅÁ¡ÉÓõ, ¦ÀÕí§¸Î¸¨Ç À¢ü¸¡Äò¾¢ø Å¢¨ÇÅ¢ìÌõ «À¡ÂÓõ ÅÃŨÆìÌõ þó¾ Å¢Àã¾ §À¡ìÌ Á¡È¢É¡ø¾¡ý ¦Àñ¸ÙìÌ Å¢§Á¡ºÉõ ¸¢¨¼ìÌõ.

þ¨½Âò¾¡ø ¯Ä¸ ±ø¨Ä¸û ÍÕí¸¢Å¢ð¼ ¸¡Äò¾¢ø ÌÚ¸¢Â ÁÉôÀ¡ý¨Á¸Ùõ, ¸ü¸¡Ä ¸ðÎôÀ¡Î¸Ùõ «¸Ä¡¾ Ũà ¦Àñ¸ÙìÌ ÓØ Í¾ó¾¢Ã¦ÁýÀÐ ¸¡Éø¿£Ã¡¸ò¾¡ý ¿£ÊìÌõ. §À¡Ä¢Â¡É À¨Æ ¦¸¡û¨¸¸¨Ç ¨¸Å¢ðÎ ¬ÏìÌ ºÃ¢¿¢¸÷ ºÁ¡ÉÁ¡É Á¾¢ô¨ÀÔõ, ¦ÀÕ¨Á¨ÂÔõ «¨ÉòÐô ¦Àñ¸ÙìÌõ ¯Ä¸Óõ, ºÓ¾¡ÂÓõ ÅÆí¸¡¾ Ũà '±í¸ÙìÌ Í¾ó¾¢Ãõ ¸¢¨¼òÐŢ𼾡?' ±ýÈ §¸ûÅ¢Ôõ, ¸¢§ÄºÓõ «¼í¸ô§À¡Å¾¢ø¨Ä.

ºÓ¾¡Âò¾¢ø À¡Â§ÅñÎõ ÒÐ Ãò¾õ Ò¾¢Â ţâ º¢ó¾¨É¸û, ÀÃÅÄ¡É Å¢Æ¢ôÒ½÷ þÅüÈ¢ý ãÄõ. ͸ðÎôÀ¡Îõ, ¿ø¦Ä¡Øì¸Óõ ¦¸¡ñ¼ ¬ýó¾ Å¡úÅ¢¨É «¨ÉÅÕõ Å¢ÕõÀ¢§Âü¸ §ÅñÎõ. «¾üÌ º¡¾¸Á¡É ÝÆ¨Ä ¸ðÊì¸¡ì¸ §ÅñÎõ. «¾ý À¢ýÉ÷ ¸¡½Ä¡õ §À¾Á¢øÄ¡¾ ÁÉ¢¾ÌÄò¨¾, ¦À¡Ä¢Å¡É µ÷ þÉò¨¾, ¦º¡÷ì¸ò¨¾ â§Ä¡¸ò¾¢ø ¸¡½î ¦ºöÔõ ¦À¡ü¸¡Äò¨¾.

:? :huh: :ashamed:

Sorry, Lambretta! It my entry for a essay competition held by a local vernacular daily for the 60th Independence Day exclusively for ladies, the topic, 'Have we obtained independence'. I failed to make it to the list of 10 winners! :cry3: So I sought some solace in posting it here since it is sure to be read by some! I am too bored with the result to give a translation at present!

Today I have started reading Michael Crichton's 'Next'. Nowadays I am very busy playing hostess to expected & unexpected guests, so it might be weeks before I finish reading it. As usual some casual observations of English novelists on present day trends make me pause & reflect over it with a sad heart. A sample from the first chapter:

"Here he was, alone in this damn city, with more beautiful women per square foot than he had ever seen in his life. True, they were plastic, lots of surgery, but they were also sexy as hell."

.À¡Ã¡ðÎìÌ-¯Ã¢Â ¯Â÷¾ÃÁ¡É ¸ðΨÃ.!...

... ÀÃ¢Í ¦ÀÈ ¾ÅÈ¢ÂÐ ²ý?

†¥õ.!!!.. Ţ󨾧Â.!

"¦Àñ-ºÓ¾¡Âõ... À¡Ã¾¢ ¸ñ¼ ;ó¾¢Ãõ ¦ÀüÚ-Ţ𼾡?... ±ýÚ §¸ð¼¡ø.?

«Ê¨ÁôÀðÎ ²ý-±ýÚ §¸ðÀ¡÷-«üÚ ¸¢¼ó¾ «ýÚ §¸ûÅ¢ìÌ-¯Ã¢ÂÐ.? þý§È¡ §¸Ä¢ìÌ-¯Ã¢ÂÐ.!!..

...¾ý¨É ¾¡§É þÆ¢× ¦ºöЦ¸¡ñÎ.... ÒШÁ ¿¡¸Ã¢¸õ ±ýÈ ¦ÀÂâø ¦Àñ¨Á¨Â§Â §¸Ä¢ì-Üò¾¡ì¸¢...

...¬ñ¸Ç¢ý ¨¸ô-¦À¡õ¨Á¡ö þý¨È þ¨Ç ¾¨ÄÓ¨È ¦Àñ½¢Éõ ¬ð¼õ §À¡Îõ þýÚ!!...

«ýÚ ¦ÀñÏìÌ ¦Àñ§½ Å¢§Ã¡¾¢, ЧḢ... Á¡Á¢Â¡÷, ¿¡ò¾É÷, ¦ÀüÈ-¾¡ö ±ýÈ ¦Àñ-À¢ÈÅ¢Âáö...

¬É¡ø þý§È¡?... ¦ÀñÏìÌ ¦Àñ§½ Å¢§Ã¡¾¢ ЧḢ ¾¡ý... ¬É¡ø «ó¾ ¦Àñ §ÅÚ Â¡Õõ-þø¨Ä... «ÅÙìÌ «Å§Ç ¾¡ý....

...Å¢¨Ç×.? ¾ü¦¸¡¨Ä-º£Äõ, ´Øì¸-§¸Î.!!...¦Åð¸ì-§¸Î.!.. Á¡Éì-§¸Î.!...

þó¾¢Â ¬ñ-Á¸ý ±ÅáÅÐ ¿¡¸Ã¢¸õ ÓüȢ «¦ÁÃ¢ì¸ ¦Àñ¨½ Á½óÐ... ¿£ÊòÐ Á¸¢úó¾Ð-¯ñ¼¡? ²ý?

¿Å£É ¿¡¸Ã¢¸õ ±ýÈ §À¡Ä¢ §À¡÷¨Å¢ø... ¦ÀÕ¨ÁÔ¼ý §Àº¢ ¾¢Ã¢Ôõ ¦Àñ¸û... þíÌ «¦Áâ측×ìÌ ÅóÐ À¡÷ì¸ðÎõ.. «ÅÄõ ÒâÔõ.!

...ÒШÁ¢ý ¦ÀÂáø ²Á¡Úõ ¦Àñ¸ÙìÌ þÄ츽-¿¡¸Ã£¸ ¿¡ðÎ «¦Áâì¸÷¸¨Ç À¡÷ì¸ðÎõ.!... ²ý «Å÷¸Ç¢ø º¢Ä÷ ¾ÁÐ ¿¡ðÎ ¦Àñ¸¨Ç Å¢ÎòÐ...

...¦Àñ½¢É-ÀñÒ ¾¡Æ¡ þó¾¢Â-¦Àñ¨½ ¿¡Ê §¾Ê Á½óÐ...

...¾¡Ûõ þó¾¢Â-ÀñÒ ÅØÅ¡Ð Å¡ú¸¢È¡÷¸û.. ±ýÚ º¢ó¾¢ì¸ðÎõ.!!

..¿¡¸Ã¢¸ò¾¢ý ÅÃõÒ ±Ð ±ýÀÐõ... þÄ츽-´Øì¸õ ÀñÒ ±Ð... ±ýÚõ ¯½ÃðÎõ.!

.þý¨È þ¨Ç ¾¨ÄÓ¨È ¦Àñ½¢Éõ «È¢ÂðÎõ.!! ŢƢòÐ-¦¸¡ûÇðÎõ.!!.

þø¨Ä§Âø ¦Àñ¨Á째 «ÅÁ¡Éõ.!!... ¾Á¢ú-ÀñÀ¢ü§¸ ¾¨Ä-ÌÉ¢×.!!

ÁÉ¢¾-þÉò¾¢ü§¸ ¾ü¦¸¡¨Ä-þÆ¢×.!!
.

:clap:

இந்த த்ரெட்டை ஏன் கிடப்பில் போட்டுட்டீங்க?.

ஆண்களைத் திட்டித்தீர்க்க அருமையான களமாயிற்றே.

பெண்களுக்கும் இஙு திட்டு குட்டு எல்லாம் கொடுக்கப்படுமே, வெட்ககேட்டை சொல்லும் போது ஆணென்ன பெண்ணென்ன பாகுபாடெல்லாம் கிடையாது!!!

Some armchair musings:

True to my tagline as I watch the trends of the world and from two latest stories that came to my knowledge I see what a thorny bed love marriage can be. I am amused, annoyed, outraged & ashamed by the various implications of these incidents.

First is the love story of 2 college birds in an engineering college. Both families being broadminded in allowing full freedom to their wards nothing unhappy happened throughout their course & afterwards when both were suitably placed in jobs. The boy's parents thought the time ripe for consummating the marriage. At this junction cropped up a problem: though both belonged to the same community, the boy's family is Hindu & the girl's family is Christian. The girl & her family asked the boy to convert to Christianity before taking the final step. The boy's family was not eager to convert him, but willing to let him walk to the altar to take the marriage oath in their style. But it was allowed only if he converted which involved his attending Bible classes for a stipulated time. At this prospect the boy's family, including him, did serious rethinking and called off the wedding. Now the boy's mother who is my acquaintance is looking for an alliance for son in the traditional procedure. The love story being no secret many of the eligible brides' parents are looking askance.
What baffles me is how was the boy clueless to the girl's religious convictions during his courtship. What annoys me is the necessity for both of them to turn a new leaf after having dreamt of marriage with each other for so many years. What are the effects of the past on their future lives? Have they not marred their own pure enjoyment? Was it inevitable? How strong is 'love' today? How do priorities change so easily? How beautiful would it have been to start life on a clean slate? Why can't youth have a clear perception of their life choices? All round embarrassment in both families. This not being intelligent or responsible on the part of young people whom I look upon so much for a dignified tomorrow. So, 'love' is a soap bubble to vanish in thin air! Empty nothingness?

The second is still more serious. Here the professionals in love are of 2 different religions: Mudhaliar boy & Muslim girl. Both parents out of compulsion, decency, magnanimity have consented. The boy's mother demands the girl's name be changed & wedding solemnised in their traditional way. The elders of the girl's family are agonised & outraged. The mother laments at the loving care she took in choosing a name for her when she was born. A date is fixed for the engagement which is to be in the mode of the boy's family tradition. Though the girl's house is palatial, roomy enough for the function, the menfolk are too wounded to have it under their roof. So a hall is being arranged. No cheer in the girl's family for the rites unknown/unfamiliar to them. Sincere involvement, cooperation in the proceedings carries the danger of ruffling the feathers of their religious heads which might even lead to very serious predicaments of violent eruptions. The general relief would have been a register office marriage followed by a dinner in a hall. But the boy's mother is bent on a traditional marriage. The boy says he will look after well once she becomes their family member. If he can't make his mother respect their sentiments now how is he going to after? Tries to play goody boy to both mother & lover. A coward, in short. Is not the girl taking too big risk, gambling her happiness on the assurance of an inept boy? Does she realise the pain she is causing to her parents & relatives? After all is not the blessings of elders the most precious dowry a girl take to her in-laws' house?

Bitter compromises making the base of a marriage makes it a travesty! Love is blind, they say. Very true. Inconsiderate & thankless too. Is it love or pure play of hormones, unthinking attraction, practically unwise bringing unnecessary pain & problems? Blessed are the parents with children who do not succumb to such fatal fancies!!!

sounds weird :?

did they never bothered to talk about religion/ conversion b4 the marriage?
if the really loved :? each other ...why couldnt they simply go for a reg. marriage? rendu pakkathukkum sangadam illaama poi irukkume :roll:

seems like they were fooling themself and us ...
it was just a play/ fun for them ?!

hm...eeshwara

Heartburns for bringing up such irresponsible, idiotic, inconsiderate children!

enakku ennamo parents melayum konjam thappu irukkunnu thaan thonudhu...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by crazy

enakku ennamo parents melayum konjam thappu irukkunnu thaan thonudhu...

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:notthatway: Avanga periyavanga. Avanga edhu senchaalum thappilla. Don't you know that?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by littlemaster1982

Quote:

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Originally Posted by crazy

enakku ennamo parents melayum konjam thappu irukkunnu thaan thonudhu...

---

:notthatway: Avanga periyavanga. Avanga edhu senchaalum thappilla. Don't you know that?

---

yeah...but adhu epadi pasanga pazhagum varaikkum religion oru prachanai'ya theriyaadhavanga ...kalyanathuappo thaan vandhu ...mudiyaathu/ pidikkala/ aahadhu etc solluvaanga :?

Quote:

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Tries to play goody boy to both mother & lover. A coward, in short.

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:-)

indha topic kku podhuvaa sollalai ...

iru tharappaiyum samaalikka - samathuvamaa - samadhaanamaa - balanced aa irundha - is that termed as KOZHAITHANAM :-)

In this particular case, the boy is trying to pacify one side at the expense of unfair hurt to the other. Being politic requires not hurting either side. Since he lacks the tact to do so & the guts to put his foot down at one point he fails to look masculine in my opinion.

LM, your ridicule reminds me of an old Tamil poem describing kuRuththOlai neettOlaiyai paarththu siriththa sirippu! It is a very old custom!!! This manner of youth!!!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by pavalamani pragasam

In this particular case, the boy is trying to pacify one side at the expense of unfair hurt to the other. Being politic requires not hurting either side. Since he lacks the tact to do so & the guts to put his foot down at one point he fails to look masculine in my opinion.

LM, your ridicule reminds me of an old Tamil poem describing kuRuththOlai neettOlaiyai paarththu siriththa sirippu! It is a very old custom!!! This manner of youth!!!

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u reminds me of my grandma :( aana avanga adha konjam maatthi solluvaanga
...sth like ....kurutholai sirichichaam :?

Yes, I meant the same seyyuL! My grandma too brought us up with those lessons!

PP Mam,

I just don't agree with your generalised comments on youth (including your last post). That's why I reacted so. No offence meant.

Sorry if It sounded like generalisation. I am relating 2 specific cases which are a sample of increasing irresponsibilty in the youth. That does not mean all youth are inclined to act like that. The majority still follow sensible, respectful ways. I am like Kalam, with immense faith in youth who have not so far let me down generally in their judicious, balanced, enlightened behaviour. Only certain particular instances where the youth show lack of judgement, courage & justice I get pained & angered.

PP Maam,

Even in those two cases, elders too have their share of mistakes. Everything narrows down to the individual's way of handling things, IMO.

Sorry, from my point of view, in these 2 cases the parents have only overindulged their wards!!! That in my view is their mistake!!! You see, unlike in the west, our people still have to abide by the rules & expectations of their commuity & society, besides elders of the family. Our children are not left to live their lives independently from very young age. We feed them, pay their fees, dream for their future with a raw kind of animal attachment, expecting practically nothing in return except their happiness. Not as 'civilised' as our western counterparts! Or too civilised with refined sentiments- unlike animals & birds which tend their young only till thy learn to find food & cover, to survive on their own. The concept of family life is rather deeply embedded in our tradition with mutual responsibilities. In our system weightage should be given to many things besides one's OWN happiness.

My views will be entirely contradicting to yours. Anyway, let us agree to disagree :D

:yes:

.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by littlemaster1982

My views will be entirely contradicting to yours. Anyway, let us agree to disagree :D

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Yes. My dear Friend "littlemaster1982",

Welcome to DIFFER...

This Forum is intended to discuss on different and divergent views.

So please come out in detail.. on what you have got to say...

... opposing our PP Madam's stand.
.