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I don't think She said that everyone in tamilnadu aren't clean... If a person knows that he/she's clean,why should they be even bothered about her comments???!!!... I feel a matured mind would just laugh off this comment of hers...Quote:
Originally Posted by pavalamani pragasam
BTW,What is this Thankar issue?...can someone provide a link from where I can read abt it?...
Exactly, r_kk!Quote:
Why we Tamilians are so hypercritic and not even tolerate or allowing an actress to tell her opinion? She is not saying that pre-martial sex is the most correct one than maintaining virginity. Even if she had said some thing opposite to our current so-called social values, it is her views and she has full right to express it.
As Badri rightly put it, if we consider the virginity as the status of purity of mind, then most of people from our society may not have the right to throw the stones.
Dev, how very right you are!
Funny I should remember now the Tamil proverb my grandma used to say, "should the person going to toilet in public feel ashamed or the person who happens to see it?"
who,in ur view, should feel ashamed,PP mam?... I don't understand what this proverb is all abt... :?Quote:
Originally Posted by pavalamani pragasam
Forget it :lol:
PP mam, I didn't really get what U mean to say... what is the message u want to convey thru tht proverb?... :?
Just ignore it, I said. :lol:
:huh:
*Phew* been having sum trouble accessing the Hub lately.....neways....:D
Hmm.....wat exactly is ur point?? R u saying tat when u were in college, this is wat U wud study?? :wink:Quote:
Originally Posted by sivajayan
Or if/when ur kids r in college u'd spend so much of ur money on them only to study this?? :lol2:
:?: U didn't seem to've got my point at all! :lol: I was merely pointing out the possible double standards in certain dress codes......I meant tat if girl students r forbidden from wearing even ordinary shirts w/ collars (altho I'm against tight Tees/jeans!) tat cover u from the neck onwards, how cud the edu. institutions consider it acceptable if sumone (student/lecturer) comes wearing a low-cut blouse w/ the sari (if introduced as a dress-code)....? Tats wat I was tryin to say.......got it??Quote:
Originally Posted by sivajayan
Again, wats ur point Sir?? :?: R u saying tat u wudn't go the extent of staring at such "abonormalities"?? & even if u didn't, wud u expect every other adolescent guy to be the same?? Or take an instance of ur own family members- wud u allow them to carry on w/ such "abonormalities"??Quote:
Originally Posted by sivajayan
And btw, wat "rarity" r u talking abt?? If u live in post-2000 India, u'd notice tat the fashion in question is by no means a rarity now! :lol2:
Neways, the making of these dress codes is supposedly while keeping the attitudes of the adolescents in mind!
Hmm.......well, I dunno abt rural areas in other states.....but I've been visiting the Andhranews forum lately & it turns out tat promiscuity (apart from prostitution) is all the more prevalent in the rural areas/districts of AP, as opposed to Urban cities like Hyd./Vizag.......:?Quote:
Originally Posted by rajraj
Cud Madras still be called as conservative?? :shock:Quote:
Originally Posted by rajraj
Not tat fast- tat might be a momentary relief :)......but changing it is I'm afraid!Quote:
Originally Posted by rajraj
I very much agree w/ this statement! Altho many of us might feel tat Kushboo didn't mean nething harmful unlike wat ppl. were made to fathom, she shudn't hav made such 'bold' comments on wat is treated as a senstive issue in our society, unmindful of the consequences tat she wud face! Added to this the local media, which can be capable of twisting words w/ a catchy headline itself, made her sound like she'd expressed sumthing intentionally perverse & demeaning!Quote:
Originally Posted by sbadri99
As the saying goes, Silence is foolish if we sound wise but wise if we sound foolish! :wink:
However, I'm really bemused at the fact tat a politician was one of the main ppl. who raised an uproar against her statement! Its an open secret tat most of the politicians r involved in various immoral/perverse acts themselves as their pastimes/businesses! :evil: Downright double-standards tat they shud pick on sumone just talking abt accepting pre-marital sex in our society!
I very much agree w/ this statement! Altho many of us might feel tat Kushboo didn't mean nething harmful unlike wat ppl. were made to fathom, she shudn't hav made such 'bold' comments on wat is treated as a senstive issue in our society, unmindful of the consequences tat she wud face! Added to this the local media, which can be capable of twisting words w/ a catchy headline itself, made her sound like she'd expressed sumthing intentionally perverse & demeaning!Quote:
Originally Posted by sbadri99
As the saying goes, Silence is foolish if we sound wise but wise if we sound foolish! :wink:
However, I'm really bemused at the fact tat a politician was one of the main ppl. who raised an uproar against her statement! Its an open secret tat most of the politicians r involved in various immoral/perverse acts themselves as their pastimes/businesses! :evil: Downright double-standards tat they shud pick on sumone just talking abt accepting pre-marital sex in our society!
Nope, we all should whole-heartedly accept that we have had pre-marital sex and make that statement or challenge TRUE! It does not matter even you yourself were a virgin before your marriage.Quote:
Originally Posted by r_kk
Let us admit what she says is 100% correct and be a non-hypocrite!
Why should we care or worry if an actress does not know the difference between her sex life and others' sex life???
Even if she thinks being a virgin during one's wedding is a shame- like westerners believes in-, it is okay.
Tomorrow she will also say, there is nothing wrong in having extramarital affairs as long as you protect yurself from infectious diseases.
The important thing is we all tamilians should get the name of practically impossible "non-hypocrite" degree!
That is all counts! Nothing else! 8)
I wonder how does she suggest to be safe from AIDS- infection?
Get a hiv-antibody test before having sex with the partner???
Let us ask Kushboo who seems to know everything very well!
If u dont oppose, it might make it look like we are all guilty -as if 100% of TN's today are involved in premarital sex- which is UNTRUE.Quote:
Originally Posted by r_kk
We just have to let her know in a civilized manner that her notion is not quite true.
Again, if at all Kushboo had really challenged as it has been said,
* How many men and women are not involved in premarital sex?
* Nowadays men do not care about the affairs their betterhalves had before their marriage.
I seriously think she is with a WRONG assumption and she needs to be corrected in a civilized manner for her "mistake"! 8)
BTW, how many percentage of TN people have aids????
it is not more than 10% right?
90% of the people are safer. It is quite a lot and the 90% will react for an accusation like this! 8)
The big hue and cry by “Viduthalai Siruthaikal” and “PMK” is more political than emotional. If you want to know the origin of currently blown up so called “character assignation of Tamils”, then please read the page2 of the following article.
http://www.charuonline.com/kp160.html
r_kk:
* I fully agree it is fully political.
* I never support pmk or viduthalai siRuththaigaL
* If you wish please visit Kushboo controversy thread and see my earlier responses.
* But, there are several "thamizh kudi makkaL" who are being badly HURT by her statement or challenge and feel like insulted!
* If the modern world is going to make our tradition and culture to look ridiculous, then nothing wrong in white people's notion that we are all barbarians!
* Because today, if we admit that their way of "sex life" is the correct way, then we admit that we were living like barbarians in the past century!
* And our culture and civilization and customs were going to look ridiculous.
Are you ready to accept that tamilians are barbarians ????
* I seriously think we should not PUT a SEAL on a person who slept with only one person all his/her life as a #1 fool or a barbarian in the world?
* I have a bad feeling that that is what the modern world is trying to do by "using" excuses such as AIDS or HIV or whatsoever.
* Do you want such individuals look ridiculous in front of "Kushboo class" people????
I don't think it is FAIR
:clap: :clap: :clap:
1) AIDS is out of control in Africa, and everyone knows it. But by some estimates, the most AIDS-infected country is no longer in Africa.Quote:
Originally Posted by stranger
It's in Asia, and the country is India
2) Approximately 25,000 dowry deaths per year.
3) Statistics from 2000 showed that on average a woman is raped every hour in India.
4) Sexual trends in India, according to statistics presented by Avishkaar, a counselling clinic in Mumbai, threw up some alarming facts:
~ The all India occurrence of STDs in the age group of 18 to 30 is as high as 48 to 52 per cent!
Of this, approximately 60 per cent hail from the lower strata of society where there is a lack of awareness about safe sex. The figure is approximately 20 per cent among the middle and upper classes.
THESE ARE TRUTHS ABOUT INDIA.
BUT NO THIS DOESNOT MAKE ANY OF THESE "GOOD" OR "RIGHT".
BUT IF YOU DONT ACCEPT THE TRUTH THEN THATS THE BIGGEST MISTAKE.
For a country so vast, with a population of an alarming size and a relatively young history...If only corruption in politics could be brought under check..Under the stewardship of enthusiastic leaders like Kalam the youth can easily take the country to the top of the world. But look at all the negative forces working on the environment of today's youth in rural & urban areas through the ubiquitous MEDIA! No role models imagined, fantasised but only a crass class of heroes & heroines churned out with all the foul fith of an alien culture! With enough motivation, encouragement & proper guidance both the rural & urban masses can be cajoled to do wonderfully well in the world arena. What we elect is what we get. Should we not be more careful?
“Ouvanaku oruthi’ concept is one of the best concepts where a human can keep their mind away from wandering on basic animal instincts. But this should come from the whole hearted wishes of the individuals. Such concept provides a nice atmosphere for offspring and meets all their emotional needs. At the same time, we have to note that physical virginity is not a prime important issue in a good free society for the cordial relations among family, and people are more tolerant to accept the other person with their limitations and weaknesses (In Muoso society, even possiveness is missing and realtions are without any financial expectations). How we can say that we are superior than many innocent tribes?Quote:
Originally Posted by stranger
Unfortunately, among Tamils/Indians the term virginity is now related to only “physical status of body” rather than “personal integrity of mind”. That’s why Jayakanthan’s story (Agni Parikshai) about reinstalling virginity by just bathing a rape victim by her mother made a very big hue and cry in our society in 70s. But, on the other hand the movies, which show a rape victim marrying the rapist (Puthiya Paathai) is becoming very successful. When it comes to the widow remarriages Tamil movie directors makes the widowhood immediately after the marriage (for ex. Ritham, Vaideki Kathirunthal).
Don’t you feel some thing wrong with this?
Are you ready to accept that tamilians are barbarians ????
No, certainly not. I respect some of the great cultural values of Tamils. I am very much proud to say that Tamils had the concept of “piran mania vizaya peramani” and other high morals system even 2100 years back. It doesn’t mean that our social system today is much better than the western society, since they have different values to different acts. The western societies also respect those who maintained personal integrity and whole hearted love (ex. stories like Romeo/Juliet, Edward VII).
* I seriously think we should not PUT a SEAL on a person who slept with only one person all his/her life as a #1 fool or a barbarian in the world?
I agree to your point. But, in my opinion, such persons need not bother about what the remaining world calls them. I prefer to be called as “rough barbarian” on so many issues rather then getting accepted as “polished gentleman” on the issues which I believe as correct and as long as my personal action brings no harm to others. The physical virginity is purely a personal preference. I don’t think that any strong individuals will give up their personal integrity just because of other person’s comments.
* I have a bad feeling that that is what the modern world is trying to do by "using" excuses such as AIDS or HIV or whatsoever.
I respect your feelings. We have to accept that our value system is not the same as the Sankam or pre-sankam Tamils. Please read about the statistics of HIV infections, eve teasing and female fetus aborting. I never came across sex selection among any westerners (based on many years of interactions) but I had seen strong desire for male babies among Tamilians. Do we consider female children as burden or Goddess? Why such the feeling of burden or object to be protected comes in to our mind?
* Do you want such individuals look ridiculous in front of "Kushboo class" people????
I respect even “Kushboo class” (?!) people. It is their life. The people those who themselves believe that they are some higher class, need not bother or feel ridiculous in front of “Kushboo class” people.
I don't think it is FAIR.
Yah, if she had made some bad or blanket comments about Tamil society, then it is not fair. What she told is more or like her individual opinion about some statistics. If she had said that there is no virgin in Tamilnadu or Tamil ancestral culture was barbaric, I will be standing at your side. Recommending contraceptive for unhealthy relationships and protection measures against sexually transmitted disease cannot be considered as the recommendation to involve such acts.
Where are the options?The majority is always with criminals and casteists.Who wants to encourage and guide the rural people?You are anyway between the devil and the sea.Quote:
Originally Posted by pavalamani pragasam
Education is the one and only option before us.Till these people become educated they will refuse to change.
By the way,what was this thread about? :roll:
I do not agree..In order to perform well, the common masses must be willing to be cajoled,to be motivated and should accept encouragement.In a society where blind faith on politicians,actors,actressess is the norm the bigger picture is lost.The view is only till the next election,next release etc.Quote:
Originally Posted by pavalamani pragasam
YES!!Education would help in moving the country fwd.More importantly there should be more focus on the country as a whole and less focus on different Religions/Cultures/Languages/States etc etc etc.I have no idea on how to bring about this change..Dont know if education would help!
And WHO does not accept the TRUTH here?Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandeep
What are your suggestions to take care of the AIDS here! :?Quote:
1) AIDS is out of control in Africa, and everyone knows it. But by some estimates, the most AIDS-infected country is no longer in Africa. It's in Asia, and the country is India
Are you trying to say what???
Whatever they are, let me make few things clear!
* HIV awareness and protected sex practices has nothing to do with "premarital sex" or "postmarital sex".
* One just has to be taught how one really gets infected by a virus!
* A wise mother can teach her sensible daughter EASILY. That is as simple as that!
* That is the solution for controlling HIV
* And definitely not "encouraging" to have multiple sex partners or to have teen-sex experience!
I am afraid that such an "encouragement" of "not to worry" or implying "go ahead and get experienced like westerners do" will bring several "teen-MOTHERS" like we see in the Hispanic or AAmerican population of the civilized countries!
BTW, In africa, premarital sex practice is VERY COMMON! That is why they went ahead of us!
Stranger I think you are missing the point here.
No one is argueing for premarital sex..we are just saying if ever u find yourself in such a situation or if you think its a possibility just be prepared so that you dont get some dreaded disease or find yourself with a child to support.
This is in no way pro premarital sex. Its just saying Be Safe than Sorry!!
I am sorry, I dont think so, SS! :)
:)
Well..you are entitled to your opinion!
When Khushbu said premarital sex was wide spread in India why was she attacked? No where did she say it was right.Quote:
Originally Posted by stranger
If we keep pushing problems under the carpet they will lie there are decay. Its better to bring the problems in the open and deal with it.
Dont contradict yourself !!!Quote:
Originally Posted by stranger
Its a proven fact that multiple-sex/teen sex is the main reason for HIV spreading and as you said "encouraging" them will be counter productive.Quote:
Originally Posted by stranger
But unless there is awareness among the masses that these things are happening in their neibourhood why will they take the effort (its not easy to talk about sex with your children) to talk to their children about all this. Parents need to understand that there is a good possibility that their child may get into all these. Then only will they feel the urge to speak to their children.
I thought she challenged,Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandeep
* How many men and women are not involved in premarital sex?
As if everyone is INVOLVED and everyone is LYING! WHAT kind of challenge is THAT???
should not I protest agianst her "allegation" even if I were neither involved nor I am HIV +ve????
I dont see any problem in protesting against such a challenge of questioning everybody's integrity!
She should withdraw or take back such a challenge
Kushboo's statement is only going to send the younger generation to the GRAVE.Quote:
If we keep pushing problems under the carpet they will lie there are decay. Its better to bring the problems in the open and deal with it.
I bet you majority of young punks and bimos will take "only half of her statement" and abuse it and become pregnant/hiv positive.
The percentage of HIV +ve cases is going to raise! because of young innocent victims who will not feel GUILTY in getting engaged in unprotected premarital sex when someone chaleges everybody.
The reasons:
* young women or teenagers are not going to buy Condoms to protect themselves form infectious diseases!
* NO mother or father in TN is going to buy a pack of "Kamasuthra" to their daughter on her 13th birthday nd say "be careful" either!
I dont see that it will work!
So they will end up taking only "encouragement" and end up in a mess!
* Or correct me if I am wrong, Are we going to encourage our teenage sons and 13-19 old daughters to buy condoms using the pocket money???
* or we, ourselves are going get them condoms to protect from infectious diseases???
Are we really "grown up" to that level????
If so, why do we still see 90% arranged marriages???
LET us be PRACTICAL and analyze this carefully!
Quote:
* HIV awareness and protected sex practices has nothing to do with "premarital sex" or "postmarital sex".
Quote:
BTW, In africa, premarital sex practice is VERY COMMON! That is why they went ahead of us!
I dont think I meant to do that.Quote:
Originally Posted by sandeep
I meant to say, only illegal affairs and extramarial affairs and prostitution lead us to this scenario of aids here today. There was not MUCH percentage of premarital sex in India because of the FEAR and RESTRICTIONS.
If you encouage premarital sex, and people like Kushboo to direct the younger generation, we will become like Africa soon.
Because we are not going to execute it PROPERLY. Only some "professionals" like Kushboo has the opportunity to be taught by her mom at the early age as there is lot of risk in her profession.
Not a teenage girl who is just infatuated will ever be taught by a mother to carry condoms in her purse!
90% TN population or Indians are getting married by "ARRANGED" EVEN TODAY. :roll: I thought YOU KNEW THAT! :shock:
I dont think we need Kushboo's half-baked suggestion and one-line statement to straighten out the society. If you wish to solve the REAL PROBLEM it has to be carefully done in a systematic way. It takes lot of effort. Kushboo was just "using" infections to save her neck. That is all!Quote:
But unless there is awareness among the masses that these things are happening in their neibourhood why will they take the effort (its not easy to talk about sex with your children) to talk to their children about all this. Parents need to understand that there is a good possibility that their child may get into all these. Then only will they feel the urge to speak to their children.
BTW, Except one IDIOT (tb) nobody questioned Kushboo's life until she accuses others' integrity. Nobody cared about her either.
Please dont let her question majority of the innocent tamils' integrity in order to cover her neck or justify her life!
-----------------
Quote:
* Stranger I think you are missing the point here.
* No one is argueing for premarital sex.. we are just saying if ever u find yourself in such a situation
BTW, SS, * I think Sandeep seems to get the POINT. And he has so much to say.
Thanks for criticism anyway which helped me to modify my post and mess it up too! :)
And there are no WE here. Because every hubber's view is unique and they are all with a good intention. Let us not team up in a silly manner !
:clap: :clap: :clap:
Sorry I really didnt mean to "Team" up in any manner!!Quote:
Originally Posted by stranger
It didnt even strike me that I was grouping people together.Definitely not my intention.
Boy! Long since I've been able to come online again.......:(
Yes, this is also very much possible......cine actors shud think really well abt making such 'bold' statements tat r bound to be taken another way & attract controversy. As it is, many of today's yuppie guys/gals r determined to go against our culture/values in the name of 'moving forward w/ the world'.......they r regretably labouring under the delusion tat the West has come to be 'developed' only bcos of their lack of following ne culture/social mores, which is one reason they behave the way they do....Quote:
Originally Posted by stranger
The main reason for continuity of arranged marriages in today's scenario is explained aptly by r_kk's post I'm pasting here:Quote:
If so, why do we still see 90% arranged marriages???
"Our present day marriage system is losing its value. The “Agananutru Kaadal”, where love is the whole hearted reason to devote ones life and body for his/her lover, is nearly vansihing. What we have is the remains of a traditional marriage system, which is primarily based on the financial and social status of brides and grooms, fixed through the many matrimonial columns."
As explained here, majority (tho not all) of the so-called traditional arranged marriages in today's materialistic society exist only as a means of both the families (brides' & grooms') gaining sum financial or materialistic benefit from one another, rather than uniting 2 souls forever! :evil:
While most men in our society hav married (& still r marrying) only for the sake of dowry, today even girls & their parents hav become so unabashedly calculative when it comes to marriage! :evil: While looking for a groom 4 their dughter, the 1st thing tat they r interested is in the boy's salary/other assets! And if he's in the US/newhere abroad, they don't care to think twice! Surprisngly even the girl, in most cases, doesn't protest against her parents following such a system, hardly bothered herself abt the character/behaviour/habits of her wud-be/her future w/ him! :( :banghead:
And for a few others, this system of marriage is followed only as a sort of routine custom; the previous gens. had done it so they r doing the same......monkey-see-monkey-do!
Such commercially-minded 'elders' r another reason y marriage is losing its value in our society today & promiscuity outside marriage is gaining more popularity!
Btw, tat reminds me- if ppl. cud get so infuriated abt Kushboo 'indirectly' suggesting tat we accept tat pre-marital sex is very prevalent, how come none has, so far, raised protests against actresses like Mallika Sherawat, who supported her roles of playing adultrous wives in her films by declaring tat such films "shud be a lesson to husbands who ignore their wives"! :evil: She shud've been lynched for saying so, if our public cud so quickly corner Kushboo for her statement! :shock:
Perhaps Tamil Nadu has not become fully thick-skinned as yet :lol:
Deleted by Mod...
Perhaps because outside TN film personalities are not considered anything more than entertainers.Quote:
Btw, tat reminds me- if ppl. cud get so infuriated abt Kushboo 'indirectly' suggesting tat we accept tat pre-marital sex is very prevalent, how come none has, so far, raised protests against actresses like Mallika Sherawat, who supported her roles of playing adultrous wives in her films
I have a real bone to pick with SunTV Tamil News, Pa!! As an oversea viewer, I was in a shock to see what incredible nerve and lack of total respect for rape victims, this channel has!! :evil:
I watched with horror not once, but twice to date, this dung Channel reporting rape attacks/molestation/kidnappings as the day's fare by offering close-ups of the victims!! Those poor women, were desperately trying to shield their faces to avoid the cameras!!
Just whom are they entertaining in this caper, of not sparing a single thought for these women???? And what laws does India have in preventing the media from exposing or identifying rape/molestation victims?????
Could someone please explain, if this is the norm on Indian TV channels????? :roll:
News has come to mean sensanationalism :evil: The utter callousness of the MEDIA :twisted:
Hmm........really?? :? I thot the whole nation (& even ppl. outside) practically worships Aish Rai....they (currently) consider her the symbol of the Indian woman! :lol2:Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandeep
And btw, when i read ur reply, I rem'd having read in our paper a few years ago tat sumwhere in the north (can't rem. exact place, sorry!) they built a temple for Sunny Deol bcos of his 'extraordinary' performance in the film 'Gadar- ek prem katha'......! :shock:
Oh, I don't think so. Let's not forget NT Rama Rao (Andhra) and Dr. Rajkumar (Karnataka), for starters.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandeep
http://thinnai.com/pl1006052.html
More people to speak against the decadent MEDIA!