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Thread: déjà vu ( 1. A LEARNED YES)

  1. #501
    Senior Member Seasoned Hubber ssanjinika's Avatar
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    it is a compliment vasanth.munnadi pictures'la face avalo seriya theriyalla edhula nalla errukenga

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  3. #502
    Senior Member Veteran Hubber bingleguy's Avatar
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    déjà vu (20. THE PRESS RIFT)

    THE PRESS RIFT

    That was Shree ......................

    She looked like an angel in the white half saree with a beautifully combed hair and a small thilakam on her forehead and a smile on her face ........

    She came down few steps more to sit next to him !


    Shree softly turned at Aswath. he was stunned, and his hand which were throwing stones abruptly stopped half-way thru with the pebble still in his hand. Frowing he threw the stone with more force than usual.

    The stone missed the water zone and fell on the mud water splashing droplets around it. Shree had to forcibly move back her face away from the splashing droplets touching her face.

    She turned back to see Aswath watching away from her with his lips moving but no voice coming out of them.

    She took her right arm and cleared the single thread hair which was on her forehead and face due to her sudden turning, and touched her chin and slowly wiped off the drops. She cleared her throat .... and hearing the voice, Aswath clasped his hands more tightly.

    Aswath .....

    with a sudden jerk he stood up, watched her looking up his face with a gently bayam kalandha smile .... n turned back to walk over the steps ... he would nt have reached the third step but was forced to stop by a firm n obstinate voice sayin ....

    oru nimisham..... unna pathi ........ naan konjam pesanum .......

    enna pathiyaa .... he gave grin on his face, slowly taking his thumb n wiping his nose off, enna pathi..... nee pesarthukku enna irukku ... modalla, enakkum unakkum enna irukku? and turned away from her raised his forefinger towards teh running Cauvery.... andha cauvery oda ellam mudinju poche ... he gave a grin again

    Shree looked at her toes and looked straight at his face n said enakku theriyum, aana ippo ......... she moved her head to a straight position and looked at his eyes straightly .......... mudinjadhu mudinjadhudhaan ..... Cauveryoda vittadhu ........vittadhudhaan.....

    Aswath suddenly kept a blunt face and took his lowerlip under his upper jaw and slowly released it ....

    naan Sharmi pathi pesanum ......

    Aswath shifted his face quickly towards her and came a little closer to Shree

    Sharmiyaa .... endha Sharmi ..... he quickly took his right forefinger and kept it under his chin and looked up to give an act of thinking ....

    oru nimisham, naan innum solli mudikkala .... i know wat u planned ... enna manasula vechundu dhaane .........


    Aswath's face immediately stopped grinning and he looked at her while his smile was slowly coming down to its original position, he was dumbstruck ......... he started ......

    illa, nee ippo onnum solla vendam ... naan solla vandhadha solli mudichuduren .... unna nambara avo... Aswath, i know u better..... u were not a person of this kind.... aana unnoda pidivaadham, possessiveness, kovam ... idellam avalukkaaga nee vidanum...

    done ... !? ippo naan pesalaama ? enough of ur advices or akkarai ! nee solli thirindhura alavukku enakku onnum .... he kept his forefinger on his forehead and sneered ... kettu poidala .... i know me ! enna pathi ... UNNA VIDA enakku nanna theriyum ! Purinjudholyo ..... he grinned again .....

    enna nee evvalavu easy a paathutta ... enna pathi unakku enna theriyum ? I smoke ... damn it ... doesnt mean that i have to play with somebodys life ! Am very casual ... living life as it comes .... doesnt mean that i am careless ! unakku enna pathi ennikkaavadhu nalla impression irundhirukkaa ? NO ... illave illa ... adhu dhaan enna thooki erijutta .... Anaa, avo appadi illa ... I love her, I sincerely LOVE her ! but u are a weed ! pulluruvi ... sastram, sampradhaayam, jaadhi, pazhakkam nnu yosippye thavira manasu, vaazhkai, unarchi, kaadhal .... hmn ... idha pathi ellam ennikkaavadhu yosichirukkiyaa ! NO .........

    annikki ... athana perukku munnadiyum ... hey hey hey ! naan enna avala katti pudichenaa illa avaloda permission illama ennikkaavadhu avo pakkathula vandhirukkenaa ? kai ... kai ya pudichadhukkaaga .... NO ...

    his face was red in anger and he seemed a person full of wrath

    before he could complete ....

    thats enough ! ........ there was silence for two seconds ...Aswath !

    idhu dhaan nee enna pathi therinjukittadhu, idhu naala dhaan ..... idhunaala dhaan she kept her damp eyes away from his and then looked back at him taking a deep breath ! marupadiyum solren, unnoda pidivaadham, possessiveness, kovam ! idhu dhaan ! I am not a right choice for u ... but she is !

    i know u r not the right choice for me ! I ve found my choice !

    am happy ! nee change aaganumnnu dhaan naan ......

    before Shree could complete it ... she could see Aswath walking up the steps .... she turned back with her eyes firmly fixed on the flowing river .... she sat on the steps .....

    Aswath walked up and walked towards his bike .... he took his arm towards his backpocket and little perplexed and he checked his front pocket of his branded Lee jean .... Just then an arm came right in front of his eyes from behind with the key of his bike ! He took the keys and turned back to find ........ Sharmi standing .............

    Sharmila......

    amaam, naan dhaan ...

    nee...
    he stammered but overcame and asked nee inga enna panra .....

    she was quiet, this made him more thoughtful, he moved near her ..... but by then she took him by his hand and pulled him over

    enga ... before Aswath could complete she took him over the steps and they both stood there on the top step and saw down the steps to find .................................................. .


    Saga 20 : THE PRESS RIFT is the anagram for HER FIRST STEP. We ve heard about Barbie doll .... but here is wat you have to see wat it is nealy all about -> Barbie doll = I'll bare bod / Babe I'd roll / Liberal bod
    Click here to reach the Index page of http://www.mayyam.com/talk/showthrea...A-LEARNED-YES)... All Sagas could be accessed from this page...

  4. #503
    Senior Member Veteran Hubber bingleguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ssanjinika
    it is a compliment vasanth.munnadi pictures'la face avalo seriya theriyalla edhula nalla errukenga
    ssanjinika thanks again ! saga padichittu unga valueble points n observations podunga !
    Click here to reach the Index page of http://www.mayyam.com/talk/showthrea...A-LEARNED-YES)... All Sagas could be accessed from this page...

  5. #504
    Senior Member Seasoned Hubber ssanjinika's Avatar
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    getting more and more interesting.Anan ennakku onnu puriyala..I thot ashwat was doing all this so that he could piruchify shree and sharmi.But eppo avan sharmi'ya love pannaren-nnu sollaranE.Thot he was in love with shree.

  6. #505
    Senior Member Veteran Hubber bingleguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ssanjinika

    getting more and more interesting.Anan ennakku onnu puriyala..I thot ashwat was doing all this so that he could piruchify shree and sharmi.But eppo avan sharmi'ya love pannaren-nnu sollaranE.Thot he was in love with shree.
    MISDIRECTION tats a style ! keep reading !
    Click here to reach the Index page of http://www.mayyam.com/talk/showthrea...A-LEARNED-YES)... All Sagas could be accessed from this page...

  7. #506
    Senior Member Diamond Hubber
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    bg
    super
    story is moving good..............i cant wait til the next saga!
    i thought aswath was a bad guy and shree hated him, but it seems like she was pretending as if she hated him

    anyway unga kadaikku

  8. #507
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    Nice Bingle.. keep going

    Is it becoz shree didn't reciprocate aswath's love.. he pretends to be in luv with sharmi.. so that shree gets jealous... ?
    Heavenly ~ Newzealand

  9. #508
    Senior Member Veteran Hubber bingleguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hi
    Nice Bingle.. keep going

    Is it becoz shree didn't reciprocate aswath's love.. he pretends to be in luv with sharmi.. so that shree gets jealous... ?
    Nope Anjali ! Keep guessing !
    Click here to reach the Index page of http://www.mayyam.com/talk/showthrea...A-LEARNED-YES)... All Sagas could be accessed from this page...

  10. #509
    Moderator Platinum Hubber P_R's Avatar
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    Hi BG,

    I was foxed by the last para of Chapter 19. I assumed it was a hop back in time (the "smile in her face" and "sat next to him" parts led me to think this was the past, Shree had hinted at). So Chapter 20 opened up like a nice googly for me.

    The "bayam kalandha smile", "Shree looked at her toes","damp eyes" seemed surprisingly new from Shree. The episode showed us a lot more about Shree and still keeping things nicely closeted.

    It is all very heroic to say "I am not right for you" but to have the addressee agree readily to it is painful. But to sympathize with the pain you needed to soften up Shree for the reader, which you did very cleverly. Good writing. Redeeming Aswath has also been done very carefully without mushing it too much. I suspect there is a design behind the tempered redemption
    மூவா? முதல்வா! இனியெம்மைச் சோரேலே

  11. #510
    Senior Member Veteran Hubber bingleguy's Avatar
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    Vanakkam Prabhu
    Was expecting your comments ... i know they would be penned after a careful and thorough read !

    Quote Originally Posted by Prabhu Ram
    Hi BG,
    I was foxed by the last para of Chapter 19. I assumed it was a hop back in time (the "smile in her face" and "sat next to him" parts led me to think this was the past, Shree had hinted at). So Chapter 20 opened up like a nice googly for me.
    Good to have given u an unexpected opening in this saga !

    The "bayam kalandha smile", "Shree looked at her toes","damp eyes" seemed surprisingly new from Shree. The episode showed us a lot more about Shree and still keeping things nicely closeted.
    ys, she is not sentimental or any such kind, she is human thats wat i ve depicted her as !

    It is all very heroic to say "I am not right for you" but to have the addressee agree readily to it is painful. But to sympathize with the pain you needed to soften up Shree for the reader, which you did very cleverly. Good writing. Redeeming Aswath has also been done very carefully without mushing it too much. I suspect there is a design behind the tempered redemption
    Thanks for that compliment Prabhu
    Click here to reach the Index page of http://www.mayyam.com/talk/showthrea...A-LEARNED-YES)... All Sagas could be accessed from this page...

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