A joke per day...keeps the doctor away!

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The whole MISC section is flooded with bad news and understandably quite sad and gloomy.

Still, we need some relief from such onslaught, at times, to have some balance.

Publishing a couple of arasu badhilkaL here :

q: ஏர் உழவன் சின்னத்தை சுப்ரமணிய சாமி இழந்து விட்டாரே?
a: சே, என்ன அநியாயம், அது மட்டும் கிடைத்திருந்தால் அவர் கட்சி அடுத்த தேர்தலில் இருநூறு இடங்களில் ஜெயித்திருக்குமே..

q: ரஜினி மறுபடி அல்வா கொடுத்து விட்டாரே?
a: நீங்கள் கேட்பதை நிறுத்தும் வரை அவர் கொடுத்துக் கொண்டேதான் இருப்பார்.


Another one that brought a smile to me:


The comment from a reader in Dinamalar on the news report about the alleged mirattal to JJ:

"இதுநாள் வரை அரசியல்வாதிகள் தான் பிறரை மிரட்டுவார்கள் என கருதி வந்தோம், இப்போது அவர்களையே மிரட்டவும் ஆட்கள் உள்ளனர் என்று தெரியும்போது, பலே, சபாஷ், சரியான போட்டி எனக்கூறத்தோன்றுகிறது.

[NOV]

Doctor implants new ear to a man.

Man: You fraud! You gave me a woman's ear!

Doctor: Come on, it makes no difference.

Man: It does. Now I can hear everything but understand nothing!

[NOV]

A man ordered a soup in the restaurant but, as soon as the soup arrived, he had to go to the bathroom.

To make sure that nobody touched his soup while he is away, he wrote on a napkin: "I HAVE SPIT IN THE SOUP".

Once he returned, he found a message on the same napkin: "ME, TOO".

[NOV]

Tell me why are you avoiding me these days?

Did I do anything wrong?

Please stay in touch with me atlest once in a day.

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Yours lovingly,
Bathing Soap

[NOV]

When maths teacher writes love letter !!

My Dear SweetHeart,
Yesterday, I was passing by your rectangular house in trigonometric lane. There I saw you with our cute circular face,conical nose and spherical eyes,standing in your triangular garden. Before seeing you my heart was a null set, but when a vector of magnitude (likeness) from your eyes at a deviation of theta radians made a tangent to my heart, it differentiated.

My love for you is a quadratic equation with real roots, which only you can solve by making good binary relation with me. The cosine of my love for you extends to infinity. I promise that I should not resolve you into partial functions but if I do so, you can integrate me by applying the limits from zero to infinity. You are as essential to me as an element to a set. The geometry of my life revolves around your acute personality.

My love, if you do not meet me at parabola restaurant on date 10 at sunset, when the sun is making an angle of 160 degrees, my heart would be like a solved polynomial of degree 10.
With love from your higher order derivatives of maxima and minima, of an unknown function.

[NOV]

An older Desi couple having taken all their past vacations either staying at home, or at friends' and relatives' homes in other cities decided now to stay in a top name luxury Hotel for an experience in a resort city and to cash an off-season discount coupon.

They came to the grandiose hotel, got their room keys and Bellman started escorting them.

A door opened, Husband and wife looked at each other with a big gasp.

Desi always devised their games to get better and more return for their money. The outspoken wife with tacit consent from the husband started blasting at the Bellman.

"You know we are from India. You can't fool us. You promise grand room, great view and this room does not even have a window, I don't see any bathroom. Do we have to toilet in the lobby? You think we don't know it. We have a distant cousin running a grocery store here in town, we will stay with them. I want to talk to your manager and we want our money back''

The bellman explained politely, "Ma'am this is not your room. This is just our elevator to take you to your room."

[NOV]

A blonde, socially ridiculed decided to hang herself from a tree in the park and commit suicide.

A little bit later, an old lady walked around noticed her hanging from the rope and swinging.

She asked her what she was doing and if she needed any help.

The blonde firmly replied, "I am committing suicide by hanging."

The old lady says, "You are doing it wrong sweetie, put the noose around your neck not the Waist."

The blonde responses, "Ya giving me trouble again, I tried that, "but I could not breathe."

[NOV]

A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older gent suggested the young one accompany him on his rounds so the community could become used to a new doctor.

At the first house a woman complained, "I've been a little sickto my stomach." The older doctor said, "Well, you've probably been overdoing the fresh fruit. Why not cut back on the amount you've been eating and see if that does the trick?"

As they left the younger man said, "You didn't even examine that woman. How'd you come to your diagnosis so quickly?"

"I didn't have to. You noticed I dropped my stethoscope on thefloor in there? When I bent over to pick it up, I noticed a half dozen banana peels in the trash. That was what was probably making her sick."

"Huh," the younger doctor said, "Pretty clever. I think I'll try that at the next house."

Arriving at the next house, they spent several minutes talking with an elderly woman. She complained that she just didn't have the energy she once did. "I'm feeling terribly run down lately."

"You've probably been doing too much work for the church," the younger doctor told her. "Perhaps you should cut back a bit and see if that helps."

As they left, the elder doc said, "Your diagnosis is almost certainly correct, but how did you arrive at it?"

"Well, just like you at the last house, I dropped my stethoscope. When I bent down to retrieve it, I noticed the preacher under the bed."

[directhit]

குறுக்கே

ஒருவன் : நான் எது செஞ்சாலும் என் பொண்டாட்டி குறுக்கே நிக்கிறா.

நண்பன் : கார் ஓட்டி பாரேன்.

[rangan_08]

c1 : andha ENT doctor oru cinema payithiyama ? eppadi ?

c2 : Naaka muka doctor-nu boardla ezhudhi irukke....

(courtesy : kumudham)